I work with the amazing Dr. Meg Meeker who wrote The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers (no—I’m not working in pediatrics; I work with the marketing firm that helps her with branding, social media, and other promotional projects). Anyway—in this book, she talks about the benefits to mothers, especially, for having a singular focus.
A singular focus goes against the very grain of who I am. I’ve written before about this struggle, and sadly, I don’t think I’ve made much progress in this area.
See, I have BSOS (bright shiny object syndrome), FOMO (the fear of missing out), and I believe that anything is possible.
This is a dangerous combination, people.
You need your yard excavated? You rent the bulldozer and I’ll figure out how to operate it. Washing machine broken? No problem. YouTube videos can walk me through the repair. Make $1000 next month? Yes, I can. Make my kids smarter? Why, yes, I need to implement your program right away. Lose 30 pounds? Definitely! I’ll plug your routine into my calendar.
The Internet is my dream come true turned worst nightmare. I’m the girl who would save daily newspapers and issues of Time and Newsweek because I had to thumb through them before tossing them out. Had. To. I was convinced that each contained some kernel of knowledge that I needed. To carelessly toss away unread periodicals? Horrific! Unthinkable!
So, when Friend-From-Middle-School-Band Facebook Friend or My-Sister’s-Friend-From-Church Facebook Friend posts an “amazing” article to my Facebook feed? Torture, I tell you. T-O-R-T-U-R-E not to investigate it.
You see where this goes pretty quickly? I’m surfing through irrelevant (though interesting!) articles, such as how to make homemade sauerkraut, quizzing my kids with flashcards, and researching heavy machinery operation, all while counting off sets of push-ups.
And then I crash and burn from the dizzying effect of it all.
And then I stop everything cold turkey to recover.
And then I become bored because all I’m doing is the boring, mundane stuff of life. Cook, laundry, clean up poop. Rinse. Repeat.
And then—as my personality demands, my eye catches another BSO and FOMO leads me, once again, to lose two hours inside my Facebook feed.
Rinse. Repeat.
Am I the only one who struggles with this???
Sometimes, I feel so alone. My husband is terrific at singular focus and solidarity of purpose and energy.
I stink at it and when I do it, I become bored and depressed. And then in trying to compensate, I go overboard.
I know. I know. I shouldn’t compare myself. I hear ‘ya. And I know there’s not enough of me or enough hours in the day to stay this splintered with my attention and energy. Yet, I’m not sure how to fix it without denying part of who I am.
Help?
There has got to be a beautiful compromise out there that will honor who am I and what I need to accomplish.
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