Mary Bernard

I’m doing a little planning for the editorial direction of my blog. Would you please take my survey? Pretty please?

(Aren’t the flowers pretty?)

Please tell me what you think. Please take my survey. You can find it here.

Thank you!

I’ve been blogging for about 2.5 years and have learned a lot about the craft. I have people ask me all the time how to begin blogging and about the prospect of making money doing so. I’ll share with you my 5 steps to starting a money-making blog.

1. Create.

Find a topic about which you are passionate. I believe that niche blogging can be the most lucrative. Since the web is world-wide, your audience literally spans the globe. Find your passion, focus your mission (why will you write this blog?), then go find your audience. Approach it as a “they need what I’m offering, I just have to find them” problem.

2. Establish.

Technically, the best course for setting up your blog is to buy a domain from a manager such as GoDaddy.com and self-host your site, using WordPress.org and hosts such as MomWebs or DreamHost. From there, you can find templates for design or hire a designer. This will cost you a little bit of money, but it shouldn’t be much. I’ve enjoyed my time on here on free Blogger, but were I beginning a brand-new blog, I’d probably go the self-hosted route.

3. Post.

Write posts that convey your passion. Write often—at least three times a week. Write from the heart.

4. Monetize.

Place ads on your blog using Google Adsense and Lijit (I have these). Sell your own ads. Become an affiliate for other products and companies, such as Amazon. The goal here is to diversify. You must also be prepared to make little to no money in the beginning. The title says, “money-making” not “lotsa money-making”!

5. Promote.

Remember: you are trying to find your audience. Go where they are and draw them in. Use Facebook (my second biggest source for referrals) to create a “Like” page. Use the Twitter search function to find like-minded persons to follow. Be active on communities such as BlogFrog. Send an email to your family, your Sunday school class, your co-workers asking them to check out your blog. Have business cards printed with your blog address. Creatively seek out your audience within all the circles of your life.

The magic formula for a money-making blog is this:

Keep unique and high quality content first and the rest will follow.

photo: blary54 at stock.xchng

Not long ago, I was in a small group of women, three of whom were pregnant. Inevitably, the discussion turned to childbirth stories. I remember when I was just out of college and in a small group when a woman told her childbirth story and how she had broken her tail bone during delivery. It’s a wonder I ever got pregnant after hearing her tale of excruciating misery.

Anyway, we all started swapping stories of how we delivered and the nuances of childbirth rose to the surface of the conversation. In one moment, we were all MOTHERS. In the next, we began discussing the ins and outs of our choices—some made with education, some in haste, some because of tradition or emergency, and so on—but our choices nonetheless.

And so, the conversation soon began to turn to OB’s or midwives, natural or medicated labor, C-section, vaginal, or VBAC deliveries. As the conversation progressed, I could feel that ever-so-slight “rift” dividing us. You know the one. My choice versus your choice. My choice is better than yours or I wish I could have/should have/would have chosen as you did, then I’d be right/better and you’d think better of me.

What is it about our mothering choices that drive wedges between us otherwise harmonious women? Why do we love to compare? 

Why do we elevate some aspects of motherhood to places of idolatry and “rightness” and either feel shame or disappointment if we somehow “don’t measure up”? Why do we look down our noses at others who may have chosen differently, thus perpetuating this vicious cycle?

I couldn’t help my stomach doing a little flip-flop when I heard two of the pregnant moms (who have already delivered children vaginally) voice their disappointment that they may be facing C-sections with these babies. They had been advised by their midwives—for various reasons—that a smooth vaginal delivery may not be possible, so they should prepare for possible C-sections.

“I’ve already delivered naturally. Why can’t I do it again?” one of the women said. “I don’t want to have a C-section.”

And then my guns came out swinging (in my head). Why don’t you want a C-section?, I thought. What’s wrong with a C-section?

You know what? Had it not been for a C-section, I would most likely not be here today. My mother could have died in childbirth and/or lost me in childbirth. If I weren’t here, then my kids wouldn’t be here (and incidentally, all of my kids were born by C-section, too!). In my world, C-sections are good things!

I’m not coming down hard on my friends. I know their hearts and believe they don’t really “look down” on C-sections or people who have them.

But that conversation served as a reminder to me that I’m still not quite beyond comparing myself to other women, especially in the mothering area. I’m not quite past the feelings of inferiority as I measure myself against other women because I just care too dang much what others think of me. And yes, I’m reminded that my heart still houses thoughts of judgment and condemnation towards others when I think I’ve got a “better” something—whatever the case may be.

Friends, could we mothers just let go putting others in our preconceived parameters of what’s “right”? Can we give each other a little grace to breathe, to occasionally mess up, and to also taste success? Are you with me?

 photo: bjearwicke at stock.xchng

I’m still giddy with excitement and my brain is buzzing after last weekend’s Savvy Blogging Summit. One of the things I’ve decided to do more consistently with my blog is to participate in Saturday Stumbles at It’s Come 2 This. Visit her site to find some other great bloggers and their recommendations.

What I’ve been reading this week:

Laundry Schmaundry!

If you’re like me, you, too, wrestle with your laundry: finding/making the time to do it, doing it properly, or creating a new routine.

Guess what? One of my new friends, Lauren, has a blog about LAUNDRY! I met Lauren last weekend at the Summit and was really blown away to meet someone who:

1. loved laundry and 
2. decided to devote an entire blog to the chore! 

In Lauren, I had met my match-made-in-homekeeping-heaven!

Mama’s Laundry Talk is a super-helpful and practical blog, plus Lauren is a real delight! Go visit Mama’s Laundry Talk for tips, insights, and help on all-things laundry.

A Greasy Way to Save?

Who doesn’t want to save an extra penny or two? How much you spend on hair products? Well, why don’t you consider going shampoo-free? That’s right. Just. stop. shampooing. your. hair.

You’re crazy, you say? Well, check out this essay on the “no-poo ‘do”. The post tells you exactly how to care for your “no-poo ‘do” and cites the myriad benefits of getting the gunk out of your hair. It appeals to me as a busy mom because that’s one less thing I’d have to do in the 10 5 minutes I actually get in the bathroom during the grooming routine.

Let me know what you think and if you’d try it. (If you DO try it, come back here and let us know how it worked.)

Shameless plugs (I am compensated to work on the publicity teams for the following authors and their books. I am also a paid affiliate for Amazon and do receive a small commission on sales based upon my recommendations)

This summer, I’m helping four authors with their social media and blogging efforts. Please check out their blogs, Facebook, and Twitter pages.

Frank Santora has written a book called Turn It Around, which is chock full of encouragement for persons going through tough times (who’s not going through tough times?). I know you’ll find perseverance in the pages of this book as Frank points you to the hope in Christ.

My Grandmother is … praying for me is an awesome new daily devotional written by three grandmothers—Kathy March, Pam Ferriss, and Susan Kelton—for grandmothers. It takes the reader through the book of Proverbs with Scripture, prayers, and activities.

Go check out their blogs, leave a comment, and tell a friend!

I went to the Savvy Blogging Summit this past weekend, prepared to come home and shut down my blog.

Yep. You read that right.

I was half-way expecting to leave the Summit, feeling soberly deflated from my crazy notions that this blogging thing could ever be a business for me.

But that didn’t happen.

In fact, just the opposite is true.

Let me back up a minute, though, and tell you how I approached this trip.

For the first half of 2010, I’ve felt my life has been topsy-turvy: the unprecedented Nashville flood, losing a friend in the Haiti earthquake, watching my church shut its doors, leaving Blissdom with little more than a handful of business cards and some groovy swag as my “take-away.” Because I’ve always been a “big vision,” idealistic person, these losses have chipped away at my grandiose ideas.

When loved ones die, when cherished items are destroyed, when the unthinkable happens, when expectations are never realized, dreams are obliterated.

Such disappointments cause me to reconsider everything in life and become a bit stingier with my dreaming.

Sure, I had always salivated at the thoughts of my blog making money. But I had also ballooned those thoughts to the point of worship, blurring the lines between authentic calling and my own assertions in the pursuit of success.

Going to this conference, I did my best to dismiss me and my ideas, opening myself to God’s ideas instead.

I had all but decided that—although I would continue to write—I would most likely abandon the idea of trying to make money with my blog.

Nevertheless, I went into it prayerfully that God would use it to show me “yea” or “nay.” Keep it or close it? Pursue it or leave it? I wanted to know. I wanted God to show me. I was so tired of striving for my own idols in my own strength. I just prayed God would show me how to do well that which he had created me to do.

The fact that I even got to go was a wonderful sign to me of God’s validation (thanks to the three women behind My Grandmother is … Praying for Me). The fact I found three other Christian bloggers for roommates was another. The fact that there was no traffic to the airport on Thursday morning? Well, what better sign could I ask for?

Seriously, God gave his favor on every aspect of this trip. I am reminded that God says his yoke is easy and his burden is light. I think of so many of my previous pursuits and how HARD they’ve been. Obstacle after obstacle.  Dead end after dead end.

But God confirmed that this blogging/writing endeavor is an “easy” and “light” place for me to be. What freedom to simply walk the path God has laid!

My “Take-Away”

I came home with a notebook full of scribbles of nuggets of wisdom. I made lots of new friends and have a small stack of business cards to file away. I have a to-do list and a to-read list that spans a couple of pages.

I “took-away” much in terms of practical, legitimate, immediately usable information to make my blog more readable, more easily discovered, and—ultimately—more profitable.

But, by far, for me, the biggest take-away from this conference was that I am meant to do this for God’s glory. He will equip me to do that which he calls me to do. Will it all come overnight? No. Will I become an instant millionaire? Probably not.

I am simply called to follow step-by-step in faith and watch God’s plan unfold.

And I have a bunch of like-minded Savvy Blogger friends watching with me, cheering me on every step of the way.

I’ve always had a problem with the monotony of motherhood: the I-do-this-everyday sameness of meals and laundry; the watch-setting consistency of household tasks. As sure as the sun will rise tomorrow, so will my laundry basket full.

But in the last couple of years, I’ve tried to embrace the rituals of motherhood and home managing. I want to see God’s hand in all of it. I know God’s ways are to use the ordinary means to offer his grace. He’s a God of bread, water, and fire, after all. He has taught us much and shown us much through these basics of human existence.

He probably has something to tell me through filing coupons, scraping dinner plates, and navigating the school car line, huh?

Well, friend and author Jen Seger is a few steps ahead of me in the sanctification process. Her new book, Routine Revelations, is a touching collection of these types of moments all mothers experience. Jen humorously takes us through the ups and downs of motherhood as she reflects on the ways God teaches her his truths during the routines of everyday life.

Routine Revelations is not only about errands, school projects, and church; but it is also about God’s love, forgiveness, and faithfulness. How many of us mothers have said that parenting shows us more vividly our sin and God’s mercy? How many of us know that—having been a parent—we have a new dimension of understanding for the ways our heavenly Father loves us? Jen beautifully weaves all of these themes throughout the forty-six short devotions in Routine Revelations.

I found myself chuckling, nodding my head, and whispering, “Amen, sister!” throughout this delightful book. I’m certain her insightful writing will resonate with you, too. It’s an easy “pick-up/put-down” kind of read (perfect for busy moms!) but leaves you with something to “chew on.”

Need a book for the beach or a long flight? Need a hostess gift or Christmas (it’s never too early!) gift? Want to brighten your best friend’s day?

Get Routine Revelations by Jen Seger.

Jen has graciously offered an autographed copy of Routine Revelations to a reader of The Writer’s Block!

The contest runs from Monday, July 5 through Monday, July 12, midnight (central time). One winner will be chosen using Random.org from all eligible entries. The winner will be notified no later than Wednesday, July 14.
 
To enter: You must complete #1. You have the opportunity to earn SIX additional entries, but you must leave a separate comment for each one completed. 

1. Leave a comment here telling me about your most challenging aspect of motherhood.
2. Subscribe to The Writer’s Block.
3. “Like” The Writer’s Block on Facebook.
4. Follow me on Twitter.
5. Leave a comment on Jen Seger’s blog (any post). 
6. “Like” Routine Revelations on Facebook.
7. Follow Jen Seger and Routine Revelations on Twitter.

“This is a season, honey.”

I’ve always had a negative reaction to that sentiment (usually offered as a well-meaning response to one of my whiny-tale complaints that I can’t do such-and-so).

A bristling. A knee-jerk. A restrain-myself-from-slapping-you moment.

Why? I’ve often wondered.

Oh, sure. It must be that control issue I have. I don’t want there to be a season. I want to do whatever I want to do whenever I want to do it.

If anything, though, lately, God’s been teaching me the value of fluidity. The benefit of ebb and flow. The recovery that comes with restful barrenness. The truth of Ecclesiastes.

The season for watermelon, flip-flops, and lemonade is summer. The season for mittens, hot cocoa, and fleece is winter.

The other day, one of the kids said, “I want some hot cocoa!” I said, “No! You don’t drink hot cocoa in the summer. Here, have an ice pop instead.”

It’s plain to me that seasons in the other areas of my life are sensible—even beneficial. It’s only fitting, then, to embrace the seasons of my life when it comes to home, family, work, hobbies, church life, and so on.

The season of having young children is not the season to pursue a leadership position for a Fortune 500 company (at least not for me; some women do it with ease, but alas—that’s another post: embracing who God made me and not comparing myself to others). The season of caring for aging parents is not the season for world travel. The season for establishing a career is (perhaps) not the season for marriage and family.

It is different for all. But wouldn’t it be a great tragedy to stuff myself into some mold of self-created “expectations” of what I should or shouldn’t be doing right now?

I see now that so much freedom exists in begging for God’s guidance—rather than fighting the inevitable—in the various seasons of life.

So, I may now be entering the “summer” of my life, as I turn 40 and have all my kids in school this fall.

I’m anticipating many “summer” days sipping that lemonade in prayer and reflection. 

photo: ilco at stock.xchng